


Holding Tight

by ATTHS_TWICE



Series: Family Life: The Story Beyond the Series [33]
Category: The X-Files
Genre: Caring, Episode: s04e14 Memento Mori, Episode: s06e18 Milagro, Episode: s07e07 Orison, Episode: s09e19-20 The Truth, F/M, Family, Family Feels, Hurt/Comfort, Love, Memories, Post-Movie: The X-Files: I Want To Believe (2008), Post-Season/Series 11, Sleeping Together, Tenderness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-30
Updated: 2020-03-30
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:20:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,627
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23397643
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ATTHS_TWICE/pseuds/ATTHS_TWICE
Summary: Scully thinks back on all the times she held tight to Mulder, when she needed him most.
Relationships: Fox Mulder/Dana Scully
Series: Family Life: The Story Beyond the Series [33]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1407691
Comments: 4
Kudos: 57





	Holding Tight

**Author's Note:**

> This was an idea I had, as I thought of the different times that I could imagine Mulder and Scully sleeping together, drawing comfort by the nearness of one another.

_November 2020_

Scully walked into the living room to find Mulder sitting on the couch and holding a sleeping Faith. She smiled as she walked over and stared at them.

“I could take her upstairs to bed,” she said quietly, sitting on the coffee table and touching her back.

“Nah, she’s okay,” he said stroking her hair and smiling at her. “I like holding her this way. I know she won’t be this size forever… and…”

“Mulder, she’s only two.”

“Exactly, Scully. She’s _already_ two,” he sighed and looked at her, his fingers running through her hair holding it in his fingertips. She smiled at him and he sighed again. “Look at her, she’s so beautiful and loves to be held and snuggled and loved.”

“She’ll want that for a long time,” she said, watching him watch her.

“I know, but… _this_ night won’t ever come again.” He smiled and she chuckled softly, understanding what he meant. “I love her so much. I look at her and… I can’t wait for her to grow up, to see who she will be, but I also wish time would slow down and let us have more moments like this with her every day.” He chuckled and she frowned slightly at him. He looked up at her and then back down at Faith.

“Do you see how she holds onto my shirt?” he asked softly, looking back at Scully. “I think I would consider it a family trait.” He smiled and she gave him a confused look. He looked down at Faith and took a deep breath, before looking back at Scully

She shook her head and then smiled, understanding what he meant. 

“Mulder…” 

She looked down at Faith and then back at him, bumping his knee as he smiled softly and bumped hers back. As she looked at Faith, she thought of all the times when she herself had clung to him, desperately needing to feel him close, and know that she was safe. 

___________________

_1997_

Walking down the hall after she left him outside of Penny’s room, she took a deep breath as she got dressed. Dr. Scanlon had been a lie and the treatment she was receiving was actually making her worse.

Mulder walked into her room, his expression hopeful, but his body language exhausted and almost defeated.

They were silent on the drive home to her apartment. As she sat with her eyes closed, the sun beginning to come up, he began to hum quietly along with the radio. She dozed, only waking up when his hand touched her shoulder and gently squeezed.

He carried her bag up, his hand on her back. He opened the door and she took off her coat, leaving it on a chair. Sighing, she felt exhausted, needing a shower and to go to bed. Turning around, she saw him standing there, looking almost lost.

He set her bag down and sighed, before looking up at her and attempting a smile.

“I should get going. Give you a chance to get some rest.” He nodded and touched her arm gently.

“Stay,” she blurted out and he raised his eyebrows. “Would… would you stay?”

“Yeah, okay. I could stay,” he said with a smile. “Do you…”

“I’m going to take a shower,” she whispered. “Don’t leave, okay?” He shook his head and she breathed a sigh of relief. 

Walking away, she smiled softly as she went into the bathroom, needing to wash the hospital smell from her body. Waiting as the water warmed up, she brushed her teeth and ran her fingers through her dirty hair.

She was so tired, it took all of her energy to undress, wash her hair and body, and dry herself. She sat on the edge of her bed, taking a few deep breaths to gain the strength to put on some clothes. 

Standing up on shaky legs, she took out some pajamas, plus a large Navy sweatshirt of her fathers. 

Walking silently into the kitchen, she found Mulder at the table with his head in his hands as he looked down. Raising his head as she said his name softly, he cleared his throat and stood up with a small smile.

“Do you want something to eat? Drink? Some tea?” he asked softly and she shook her head.

“I’m so tired. I just want to sleep,” she said, her eyes already feeling heavy. He nodded and stepped closer to her.

“You need to get some sleep,” he said and smiled. “I’ll let myself out, you go lay down.”

“No, I wanted you to stay,” she replied and he frowned. “Unless you... you don’t want to… That’s okay… I… you-”

“No, I can stay. I just thought you meant… I can stay,” he whispered and she nodded. Turning around, she looked at him over her shoulder, asking with her eyes for him to follow.

She heard him behind her as they walked into her bedroom. She pushed the extra pillows off the bed and laid down under the covers, sighed deeply and she closed her eyes. She heard him closing the blinds and she sighed at his care. 

“Scully,” he said quietly, and she hummed. “I uh, you want…”

“Lay down, Mulder, please,” she whispered.

“I don’t… these clothes are dirty. I don’t want…”

“There are clothes of yours in the third drawer – a shirt and sweats I think,” she said with a yawn. She heard him moving around again and then felt him lay down beside her.

Turning over, she faced him, searching his face and then reached for him, gripping his shirt as his arms went around her and she began to cry. For Penny, for herself, and for all she had been through the past few days.

He murmured in her ear and she held him close, his arms around her bringing her comfort.

________________________

_1999_

The police were still milling about Mulder’s apartment. The paramedic was in his room where she sat on his bed. She answered his questions monotonously as he examined her.

She could not account for the copious amounts of blood on her shirt or her body, especially as there was a lack of any wounds. Her shirt was unbuttoned as the paramedic examined her, asking what happened, when she looked up and saw Skinner walking into the room.

She sat up straighter as he came closer, pulling at her shirt to close it. He kept his head down and his eyes on the floor as the paramedic finished up.

She could smell the blood on her as the paramedic walked away, and the scent nearly gagged her. Standing to her feet, she raised her eyes to Skinner's and stood tall as she walked over to him. 

“You’re okay?” he asked quietly and she nodded, her hands holding her shirt together, the buttons forgone. “Agent Mulder said you were attacked, and by the looks of it, I would have to agree.”

“I’m fine. sir,” she said quietly, the feel of Naciamento’s fingers pushing into her chest making her suddenly queasy. 

“That’s a lot of blood for you to be _fine_ ,” he stated and she looked at him. His expression was unreadable and so she showed him, opening her shirt, causing him to look away and clench his jaw.

“How do you explain that?” he asked as she buttoned her blood soaked shirt, feeling bile in the back of her throat with each push of the small buttons through the sodden corresponding hole. “How do you explain the dead man in the basement for that matter?”

“Sir?” she asked, looking questioningly at him. 

The bedroom door pushed open further and Mulder stepped in, looking between the two of them. His shirt was stained with her blood and the sight made her mouth water, the bile rising to the surface.

She barely made it to his bathroom, before she vomited in the toilet. The smell of the vomit mixing with the blood coating her clothes and body, caused her to vomit again. Hoping to stop another wave, she took deep breaths to calm herself.

Standing to her feet and flushing the toilet, she washed her hands, and reached for Mulder’s mouthwash. Rinsing her mouth with water first, she then used the mouthwash. She avoided looking in the mirror, knowing it would cause another round of vomiting. Putting the mouthwash away, she washed her hands again, and left the bathroom.

Skinner had left and only Mulder remained, smiling at her, though it was strained. 

“Let’s get out of here,” he said softly, reaching for her upper arm and holding gently. She allowed him to lead her past the police who were still investigating and Skinner, who looked at Mulder with a nod.

Out of the building and to his car, they spoke not a word. He remained silent on the drive to her apartment. He walked with her and not until they stepped inside, did she realize he had his overnight bag in his hand.

Setting her keys down, she walked silently to the bathroom, and turned on the shower. Stripping off her clothes, she stepped inside, turning the water on as hot as she could stand it. She scrubbed at her skin, holding her breath as she washed the blood away. She started to cry, her hand over her mouth trying to stifle it, so Mulder did not hear her.

Finally calming down and feeling clean, she turned the water off and stepped out of the shower. Walking into her bedroom, she got dressed and laid down in bed, as she heard the shower starting. 

Lying on her back, she rubbed her chest, the pain and ache pulsing under her fingers. She shook her head, closing her eyes, listening to the silence in the apartment as the shower stopped. Trying to hold back her tears, she turned onto her side, facing away from the door.

The door opened and she held her breath.

“Scully? Are you okay?” 

She choked back a sob and she heard him step into the room. He walked around to the other side of the bed and lay down beside her, wrapping his arms around her, as she clung to him, his shirt held tightly in her hands.

He smelled of her body wash and also of Mulder. Under different circumstances, the knowledge that he had been in her shower and was now in her bed, would have set her heart racing, but tonight it was as though she was wrapped in a cocoon of protection.

He held her until she fell asleep. When she woke and cried out, her arms flailing to stop an invisible attacker, he was there, holding her close and calming her with his words, his touch, and his scent.

____________________

_2000_

She sat on the floor in the bathroom, wrapped in the blanket Mulder had placed on her shoulders when she began to shake, as Donnie Pfaster lay dead on the floor of her apartment.

Mulder had checked him, finding him dead, and he stared at her, saying her name, shaking her slightly to get her attention. It snapped her back and she stared at him.

His eyes searched her face and he took the gun out of her hand and put it on the table.

“Scully. Scully. Can you hear me?”

She nodded, but said nothing. He placed his fingers under her chin and tipped her head back to look at him. As soon as her eyes met his, she started to cry, the memory of years ago resurfacing. He pulled her to him and moved them away from Donnie’s body. 

He sat her at the table and took out his phone, phoning in the attack and the shooting. She could hear him, though it sounded strange and muffled. Looking down, she could see Donnie’s blood beginning to pool under him. She began to breathe hard and then Mulder’s hand was on her shoulder, saying her name until she looked into his eyes.

“You’re okay. I’m here. He’s dead. You’re okay.” He put his hand on her neck, his thumb at her cheek. “You’re okay.” She nodded and closed her eyes, taking deep breaths, as he continued to murmur reassuringly. 

The police arrived and took her statement, her weapon, and photos of her injuries. As soon as she was able, she had escaped to the bathroom, her body feeling as though it was an autopilot. 

Mulder had let the water out of the tub and she had heard him and a police officer, after they had taken photos, throwing out all of the candles in the bathroom, for which she was extremely thankful. 

Now as she sat on the floor, she began to ache. The adrenaline was wearing off and she could feel every bump and bruise on her body.

Pushing herself to her feet, she left the bathroom and walked into her bedroom, closing the door behind her. The open window made her feel nervous, so she closed it and then felt angry at herself for feeling that way.

Taking off the blanket, she heard the door open, and turned to see Mulder walking into the room. As she did, the mess from the destruction of her room, made her sigh. She heard him stepping on the glass covering the floor as he came further into the room. 

“If you want to pack some things, we can get out of here,” he said, smiling softly. 

“Yeah,” she said quietly, opening a drawer and taking out her Bible with a glance at Mulder. 

“You can't judge yourself.”

“Maybe I don't have to,” she said, as she sat on her bed. 

“The Bible allows for vengeance,” he said, as if that made what she did acceptable. 

“But the law doesn't.” she countered. 

“The way I see it,” he said, leaning closer to her. “He didn't give you a choice. And my report will reflect that... in case you're worried. Donnie Pfaster would've surely killed again if given the chance.”

“He was evil, Mulder,” she agreed with a slight nod. “I'm sure about that, without a doubt. But there's one thing that I'm not sure of.”

“What's that?”

“Who was at work in me. Or what... what made me... what made me pull the trigger.”

“You mean if it was God?”

“I mean... what if it wasn't?” she asked, staring at him, honestly worried and scared. He did not answer and she sighed, pushing off the bed and standing to her feet. 

“Scully…”

“I’ll get some things together, Mulder,” she said, setting her Bible down, not looking at him; worried what she would see in his eyes. Opening drawers, she grabbed some clothes and packed a bag. 

She stepped into the bathroom to get her toiletry bag and added it to her bag of clothes. He took the bag from her and she smiled slightly. 

“You need a coat,” he said and she nodded, taking one out of the closet and putting it on, groaning softly as she did. He caught her eye and she shook her head.

He opened the door and let her walk out first, staying close, but not touching her. The police officers said nothing as they walked past, out the front door, and down to his car. 

Pulling up to his apartment fifteen minutes later, she sighed as she got out, everywhere on her body aching. He carried her bag upstairs and at his door, she felt tears clogging her throat. 

He brought her bag into his bedroom and set it on his bed. Turning around, he sighed and put his hands in his pockets.

“I know you probably don’t want to take a bath, but if you did I can get it ready for you.”

“No, not a bath. Not tonight,” she said, closing her eyes and shaking her head. “A shower would be great.” She gave him a small smile and he nodded, walking into the bathroom.

She heard him turning on the water and she sighed, feeling the tears threatening to fall. He walked out of the bathroom and gave her a tight smile.

“I’ll get you a towel. You go ahead.” He nodded at her and she took off her coat and stepped past him.

She closed the bathroom door and sighed as she began to take off her pajamas, intent on throwing them out, not wanting to keep them for any reason.

Looking in his mirror, she could see all the bruises on her body. She could feel multiple cuts, and knew there would be many more that she would feel once the water hit them. Sighing deeply, she stepped into the shower and closed the curtain, the warm water hurting immediately.

She eased further into the shower and closed her eyes as it washed over her. She heard the door open and then close, knowing he had brought in a towel for her. 

She sighed as she picked up his soap, breathing in the scent that even in the box on the shelf at the store, smelled like Mulder; it was his and his alone. She washed her hair twice, and then shut off the water.

Drying off, with the towel that smelled of fresh laundry, she walked into his room and found the door shut, giving her some privacy. Opening up her bag, she saw that she seemed to forget to pack pajamas, most likely not thinking of it, as she was already wearing them. 

Shaking her head, she took out a pair of underwear and put them on. Keeping the towel wrapped around her, she walked over to his dresser and took out one of his black fitted long sleeved shirts and put it on. It was too big, but she did not care; it smelled like laundry and Mulder. 

She took her towel into the bathroom and dried her hair as best she could, before she hung up her towel, and used his brush. 

A knock at the door startled her and she set the brush down and walked over to open it. Mulder stood there with two mugs and a small smile. She took one and stepped back to let him into the room.

“I didn’t pack pajamas… I borrowed a shirt,” she said, motioning to the one that was skimming her leg at mid-thigh.

“No problem,” he said quietly, setting his mug down and staring at her. She sat down on the bed with her mug and sighed. 

He walked into the bathroom and came out with a bottle of pills in his hand. She knew they were the pain pills she had gotten for him when he came back from the hospital recently. As she sighed again, he opened them, taking one out and handing it to her. 

“Take it. I know you must be hurting, and it will help you sleep.” He held it out and she took it, putting it in her mouth as he handed her her mug of tea. She took a drink and swallowed the pill, handing the mug back to him.

They were both quiet as she sat with her head down. The silence in the room was so loud, she could hear every breath he took.

“Scully…”

“Mulder…”

“No, Scully, listen,” he said, squatting down in front of her, and touching her knees. She looked at him and he squeezed lightly. 

“I know you’re questioning yourself but… Scully, he would have killed you. _Killed_ you Scully.” He shook his head and she felt tears filling her eyes. “If he had, he wouldn’t have stopped and we might not have found him. Twice… Twice he came for you… I should have listened to you… I…” He shook his head, dropping it as she heard him take a deep breath. 

“Mulder…” she whispered and he looked up at her as tears spilled over.

He moved closer and pulled her to him. She wrapped her arms around him, holding him tightly. He held her as she began to cry, keeping his hold on her loose, as though he was mindful of her sore body, which made her cry even harder. He always seemed to know, even without her saying anything.

She clung to him, grasping his shirt as he held her even closer, neither of them speaking. He let her cry and when she had calmed a bit, she relaxed her hold, but kept her arms around him. 

“I didn’t have… didn’t have to kill him,”she whispered.

“Scully…”

“You had him Mulder,” she said, pulling back and looking at him as she shook her head. “He wasn’t armed, you had him… I…” She shook her head again and he brought his hands to her face holding her still.

“Scully, you…”

“I could have shot you,” she whispered. “I was… It was like slow motion. I saw you, I heard you, but everything was slow. I…” She tilted her head back and his hands dropped from her face. “I... I could hear his voice in my head, hear his words, feel his breath on me and I…” She looked at him and he stared back at her. “I could have shot you, Mulder. Mulder…”

She reached for him, again clinging to him tightly, crying into his neck, whispering she was sorry, so sorry. He held her, whispering her name, his hands soothing as he rubbed her back gently. 

As her sobs began to subside, he pulled back and kissed her forehead. Standing up, he reached for her hands and pulled her gently to her feet. He stroked her cheek and led her to the other side of the bed, pulling the covers back and moving to allow her to get in the bed. 

She laid down and closed her eyes as he covered her and brushed her hair back. She took deep breaths, breathing in his scent as it surrounded her. It was a few minutes before he laid down beside her. She turned toward him and they laid not touching, but looking at one another. He shook his head and sighed as he stared at her face, reaching to touch her lip with his thumb.

“Scully,” he breathed and she moved to lay closer to him. She grabbed a handful of his shirt as he put his arms around her, his hand in her hair as he hummed close to her ear. 

“He didn’t give you a choice, Scully,” he said softly, and she stifled a sob. “Good, evil… It’s not just one or the other. There was no other option.” She sobbed and this time, she did not hold back, crying into the crook of his neck as he held her close. 

He whispered in her ear as she cried, her body becoming heavy as the medicine began to work, and her grip on him relaxed. 

Waking up, she stretched and groaned, her body stiff and aching. She buried her face in the pillow and took a deep breath, smelling Mulder and she smiled. 

Opening her eyes, she saw she was alone in his bed. His side was still slightly warm and she knew he had not been gone for too long. Moving her hand from his pillow, she thought of how he had cared for her and she sighed. 

Pushing the covers back, she got up and grabbed her toiletry bag as she walked into the bathroom. She looked at herself in the mirror as she brushed her teeth, careful of her sore lip, and she shook her head. Brushing her hair, she did not bother with makeup before leaving the bathroom. 

Putting on a pair of pants, but not changing her shirt, she walked into the kitchen. Mulder had his back to her, making something on the stove. Feeling a sense of bravery, she walked over to him and wrapped her arms around his waist, laying her cheek on his back, and closing her eyes.

“Hey,” he said in a happy surprised tone, as he placed his hand over hers and then turned around to face her, putting his arms around her. “There’s coffee.” She hummed and listened to his heart beating. “You okay?” 

“I will be,” she said quietly, and he hummed. 

“I talked to Skinner this morning,” he said. “Your door needs to be replaced and they will have someone in to clean your place, but you’ll need to stay in a hotel for a couple of nights…” She sighed and he rubbed his hand up and down her back. “Or you could stay here.” 

Pulling back, she stared at him as he smiled softly and she knew she could not stay, as much as she may want to. Last night, she had needed him, but she could not become dependent on him. It would be so easy, but it was not right. 

Even as she battled internally, her heart seemed to have made a decision of its own. 

Lifting up on tiptoes, she kissed him, her hands on his chest. He pulled back in surprise, looking at her, his hand coming up to run his thumb across her lips, stopping at the cut upon it. 

She grasped his shirt and pulled him back down, kissing him again. He gripped her hip and kissed her back, until she pulled away, wincing and touching her lip.

“Sorry,” she whispered, attempting to step back, but he stopped her, gently holding her waist.

“Don’t be sorry,” he whispered back, stroking her face, and she smiled.

“You said there was coffee?” she asked, hoping to break any tension, and he smiled with a nod. He released her and she took two mugs from the cupboard and poured them each a cup of coffee. He turned back to the stove, stirring something in a pot.

“It’s oatmeal,” he said almost apologetically, and she rubbed his back, silently telling him that oatmeal was fine.

Coffee and oatmeal on the table, they sat down to eat, silent as they did. As they finished, she sighed and reached for his hand. He looked at her and she smiled.

“I think it’s best if I stay at a hotel,” she said and he nodded, squeezing her hand.

“You’ll need to pick up some pajamas,” he teased and she smiled, looking down at his shirt.

“I think this will be okay,” she teased back, pulling at it and he nodded again.

“Consider it yours,” he said and she sighed.

“Thank you… for last night. I…”

“Scully, you don’t need to thank me,” he said, shaking his head as he looked down. “If I had listened to you…” She squeezed his hand and they both sighed. He looked up at her and she gave him a half smile.

“A hotel _would_ probably be best. Bed to yourself… your own bathroom.” He smiled and she nodded with a small chuckle.

Letting go of his hand, they finished their food and took their dishes to the kitchen. She went back into his room and picked her pajamas up off the bathroom floor, taking them into the kitchen to throw them away. Mulder glanced at her, but said nothing.

Packing up her other things, she put on her coat, leaving his shirt on underneath, not bothering with a bra.

She brought her bag out and set it on the dining room chair, looking at him with a sigh. He nodded and went to get dressed.

He took her to a nearby hotel and at the door, she kissed him again, though she kept the pressure light and mostly on the right side of her mouth. He touched her sore lip gently with his thumb and kissed her forehead, smiling as he said goodbye.

She showered, putting his shirt back on, and took one of the pills from the bottle from his apartment. Closing the blinds and laying down, she sighed deeply, her body aching. 

Turning over, she grabbed a pillow and held it close, wishing it was Mulder, but finding comfort in the scent of his shirt as she fell asleep.

______________________

_2002_

Scully woke up, her heart racing, reaching out as she heard William crying down the hall. Sitting up, she looked around, breathing hard as she realized she was not at home. She was in a motel room and William was _not_ down the hall crying for her.

Grasping at her chest, she took deep breaths of air, feeling as though she would never catch her breath. 

“Hey. Hey. Scully!” 

She heard Mulder, but could not respond, her chest aching and breaths threatening to choke her.

“SCULLY!” he shouted as he shook her and held her by her shoulders, looking into her eyes. “Breathe. Breath in. Good. Out. In. Out. Good. There we go.” He rubbed her back, repeating to breathe as she calmed down, the grip on her chest listening.

She shook her head, tears filling her eyes and she took deep slow breaths. Unable to stop the tears, she began to sob, drawing her knees up and burying her face in her hands, the sobs shaking her body.

Mulder rubbed her back soothingly, not saying anything, simply sitting with her as she cried. When she had calmed, her cries subsiding, she turned and wrapped her arms around his neck, clumsily climbing into his lap and wrapping her legs around him. He held her tightly, whispering her name as he rocked her gently.

He rubbed her back softly and his warmth, words, and scent calmed her further. She took deep breaths and soon was breathing normally as he continued to hold and rock her.

“Okay now?” he whispered, and she nodded against his neck. He hummed as he stroked her back and she made to move, but he stopped her, holding her close

Shifting them slightly, he lay back and rolled them to their sides, still holding tight to one another.

“Do you want to talk about it?” he whispered, and she took a deep breath.

“Just a bad dream,” she whispered, holding back what it had been about. 

“Mmhmm,” he hummed and she knew he was waiting, but would not push. She took a deep breath and held his shirt tightly in her hand and the other at his neck.

“I thought I heard William crying,” she whispered with a sob and he tightened his hold on her. “I… it seemed so real, I just…” She sobbed out a breath and gripping at the neck of his shirt, pulling him close with her other hand. 

“Scully,” he whispered and she heard tears in his voice, causing her to cry harder. “I’m so sorry.”

They clung to one another, crying for the son they had lost, as they lay in the dark of a roadside motel room, where no one knew of the loss they had endured. 

________________________

_2009_

Scully leaned against the wall, people rushing past her as she took a deep breath and closed her eyes. She was dead on her feet, the hospital overrun with a flu that was hitting the area hard. She had been working back-to-back shifts for three days, and had not been home. Instead, she had only caught a couple hours of sleep in an unused room, and that was at least sixteen hours ago. 

She opened her eyes and saw Mulder at the end of the hall, a bag in his hand, wearing a face mask. When he found her, she saw his eyes light up.

Pushing herself from the wall, she walked toward him, meeting him halfway. Reaching for his hand, she squeezed as she smiled at him.

“Hi,” she said and watched his eyes crinkle as he smiled.

“Hi to you,” he said, his voice muffled behind his mask. She smiled and reached for the bag.

“Thank you for bringing this,” she said and he stopped her from taking it. She frowned and he winked at her, interlocking their fingers and giving her hand a little tug.

“You need a break and I know what to do,” he said, pulling her down the hall, and heading back from the direction he had entered.

“Mulder, I am exhausted. I don’t…” she sighed and he chuckled. 

“No, Scully, not _that_ ,” he said, turning to look at her. “But I do have something for you. Trust me.” She gripped his hand and let him lead her, trusting him as she always had.

They walked out of the hospital and she blinked in the late afternoon sunlight, something she had not seen for a while. Continuing across the street, they walked to a hotel and she stopped him outside the doors.

“What are we doing here?” she asked and he smiled as he took off his mask, and bent his head to kiss her softly.

“ _We_ are staying here tonight. I got us a room. We can order room service or have dinner down at the restaurant, but tonight you are taking a break. A real one, away from the hospital and getting a decent night's sleep.” 

“Mulder,” she breathed and wrapped her arms around his waist. “Thank you.”

He hummed as he held her and when she pulled back, she kissed him, putting her thanks into her kiss. Humming again, he smiled as they broke apart and he took her hand.

The room key procured, they rode up the elevator, her hand in his and her eyes closed, so very exhausted. Stepping out and walking to the room, she sighed, the thought of the bed and sleeping, feeling like a happy dream. 

He opened the door and she breathed his name as she stepped inside. It was a suite, not just a room, and she smiled as she looked around. 

The main room had a sitting area and a dining room, with the bedroom to the left. She walked further inside and saw the large bed and closed her eyes briefly at the thought of sleeping and its softness. The bathroom was large and had a huge tub; bubble baths sitting atop a stack of towels and washcloths.

She turned around and smiled at him, walking back and holding him once again. “Thank you. This is exactly what I needed,” she said with a sigh. He rubbed her back and they swayed slightly.

“How about you take a bath? I’ll order some dinner and we can eat up here and then you can sleep for as long as you would like.” 

“That sounds wonderful,” she breathed, already feeling pulled into sleep by the nearness of him.

A few minutes later, she was relaxing in a tub full of lavender scented bubbles and she heard him ordering food for their dinner. Closing her eyes, she leaned her head back, her worry for the patients and the other doctors at the forefront of her mind.

This strain of the flu was the worst she had seen in a long time and the extra work was taking a toll on everyone. Trying to let it go, she took another deep breath and hummed out on her exhale.

The door creaked open and Mulder walked in as she opened her eyes. He sat on the side of the tub and reached for her arm, rubbing it gently as she moaned her approval.

“Dinner should be here in about an hour. How about a massage when you’re done?” he asked and then laughed at the expression on her face. “ _Just_ a massage, I promise.” He held up three fingers, in a Scouts honor salute, and crossed his heart. She nodded and closed her eyes as he continued to rub her arm.

Fifteen minutes later, she was lying face down on the bed, warm and pink from her bath. His strong, large hands began to knead her tired muscles and it felt so wonderful, she started to cry.

He did not let up, continuing to rub her back, legs, arms, and her head. She cried for her older patient who had died, the little boy she had to intubate, and the family members she had to speak to about their loved ones. He told her to turn over and she did, still crying as he rubbed her arms, concentrating on her hands, kissing her palms when he was done. 

He rubbed her head, overlooking her tears as he rubbed gently, his thumbs bringing her deeper relaxation and causing her to cry harder.

He moved down her legs, rubbing her thighs and shins. Taking his time on her feet, he used his thumbs, the pressure making her weep. Her toes were twisted and pulled gently, before he rubbed the soles of her feet once again. 

Coming back up, he kissed her forehead, as a knock sounded at the door. He walked away, closing the bedroom door behind him. She lay still as her tears began to diminish.

She would have fallen asleep as she lay there, if not for the door opening and Mulder kissing her forehead again, telling her the food was there and he was leaving her robe beside her. She nodded and he walked out of the door again.

She sat up and slid on her robe, the one he had brought from home, and opened the door to join him for dinner.

After they ate, he stood up and took her hand, pulling her to the bathroom, grabbing her toiletry bag along the way. She brushed her teeth and as she applied her nighttime face lotion, he told her he had the clothes she had been wearing sent down to the laundry service and they would be ready in a few hours. Shaking her head, she walked over to him and held him again.

“Mulder,” she sighed and he scratched his nails on her scalp. 

“You’re helping people, Scully. It’s your turn to be helped.” She started to cry again and he led her to the bed.

Laying down together, she clung to him and she cried, the past few days beginning to catch up to her. Too many deaths, too many sick people, too many sad and broken nurses and doctors.

His arms around her and his voice soothing her, was what she needed the most in that moment. Clinging to him, she let his soft words lull her to peaceful sleep. 

_____________

_2020_

Shaking her head, she stared as Faith held tightly to Mulder’s shirt. She loved him so much and was always happiest when she had his attention. She was a daddy’s girl through and through and Scully loved it. Having been one herself, she understood the importance, especially at a young age. He was her best buddy, her hero, the one she ran to for love and comfort, and the one she looked to for silliness and reassurance.

“Hmm,” she said, touching Faith’s head again, causing him to look up at her, his eyebrows raised. “If holding tight to you is a family trait, then she’s learning early. Learning that we all need something or someone to hold onto when we are scared or sad. Someone to help ease our pain and take the weight when we can’t carry it anymore. We all need that, whether we are two or thirty, forty or fifty seven. We need someone who will hold us while we cry, calm us when we are scared, and take care of us when we have forgotten to take care of ourselves. We need that security and that is sometimes found in simply holding tight to the person we love.” She smiled and he stared at her, his face breaking into a huge smile, as he shook his head. 

“Get over here, Scully,” he said quietly, and she leaned forward as he did the same. 

Pressing her lips to his, she did what she had done for years; grabbed a handful of his shirt… and held tight. 


End file.
